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[23 Oct 2007|01:09am] |
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Wow! I have a livejournal!
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| collage thingy |
[10 Feb 2007|09:26am] |
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yeah the collage got fucked up somehow.
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[20 May 2006|08:11pm] |
So I fucking did it. it's done. he's gone. its saturday night. our usual night together. I can't function right. I want to drink. have nothing TO drink.
he's gone. he may not have ever really loved me. he may not have ever really cared. and if that's true, I'm sorry I wasted his time.
I don't really know what to do with myself. I'm so fucking lonely but at the same time I want every body to leave me the fuck alone.
so its done. instead I feel like I terminated something really good and whole and wonderful. sometimes I don't know what the right thing even is anymore.
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| yay for Yeti's!! |
[17 Jan 2006|09:49pm] |
click...click...click...
The Girl looked to her right. Dark whiteness out her window.
Her friend (who happened to be a Guy) had stopped the car, still running, in a parking lot because the blizzard had become blinding. They were listening to something shitty on the radio.
You see, most scary monsters can't stand shitty music, it makes them very angry. But unfortunately, the general public of humans can stand it, which is why the top 40 every sunday morning contains absolute crap. These two humans obviously could stand shitty music.
Their first mistake was cracking the windows so they could smoke. The Girl joked to the Guy about something not worth mentioning because of its utter stupidity and she snorted loudly.
click...click...click...
'What is that sound?'
'um. yeah. I don't know. but this new Lindsay Lohan song is ROCKIN! cause like she's hot. so everything she does is like....good or something.'
'heh whatever.'
The sound of breaking glass joins the cacaphony of HELL emanating from the radio. The ear shattering roar of an angry beast drowns out the singing hyena sound for a precious moment. One huge, nappy fur-covered arm reaches through the Girl's window and beats the shit out of the radio system until it shuts the hell up. The Girl's door is ripped off the car and a huge furry YETI sticks his head inside the car. He smiled with huge teeth and said,
'HI!'
His furry face with its black eyes and sharp yellow teeth, I think, was kind of cute. But the Girl apparently didn't think so because she screamed and started hitting the poor Yeti on the arms and chest in utter terror.
The poor Yeti just wanted to be nice and save the poor people from bad music. But this Girl was BEATING him. And eventually the Guy, in his terror and in his anger at having his car messed up, started beating on the poor Yeti too.
The combination of three things summons the Yeti from the Underworld:
blinding blizzard
music so bad that you want to drill a hole in your brain
stupid, annoying laughs
And for reasons unbeknownst to me, the combination also tends to incite hot fiery passion in their loins. This particular Yeti started to kinda get turned on, but there was no way he could start getting it on with these guys unless he had some help from his....YETI POSSE to help him get these guys to stop beating him up. So he figured these kids wouldn't be going anywhere in the blinding whiteness of the January blizzard, so he got out of the car, and with his SUPER YETI VISION was able to find the portal from which he had emerged from the Underworld and called his YETI POSSE (this particular Posse of Yetis were called the Vegemite Posse, because, well... they liked to use Vegemite in various...creative ways.)
And in one minute, the Vegemites, in their great number of ten were standing around the car in circle. All of them with burning hot love aches in their furry loins.
And well, you can probably guess what happened then. The Guy and the Girl were slathered with Vegemite and had warm furry Yeti love the whole night long.
And once again, the Yeti saves the day from Lindsay Lohan...? Well, no not really, but at least the poor lonely Yeti's got laid.
So the moral of this sad sad story is that if you are ever parked at night in the middle of a snowblind, be sure to stay quiet and if you have to listen to something on the radio, make sure it doesn't suck. For if you don't you may find yourself covered in Vegemite and VERY VERY sore in the morning.
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| BPAL wishlist |
[16 Nov 2005|05:36pm] |
Ice Queen (any amount!!)
Monsterbait: Underpants
TAL: Crucible of Courage
Baobhan Sith
Cheshire Cat
Shattered
Madrid
Sheol
Lust
Snow White '05 (to fill up my bottle)
Sylph
Undine
Taurus
Black Lotus
Sundew
Morrocco
Odin
Tarot: Strength
Aunt Caroline's Joy Mojo
Block Buster
Embalming Fluid
Envy
Follow Me Boy
Grand Guignol
Horn Of Plenty
Jazz Funereal
Queen
Red Devil
Voodoo
Water Of Notre Dame
Wolf's Heart
Discontinued:
Unseelie
Haitian Lover
Swallow's Blood
Bat's Blood
Juju
Three Jacks
Lobban
Mabon
Also, empty bottles of
Lust
Wrath
TAL: Lionheart
Pumpkin Patch IV
Ice Queen
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| BPAL! |
[15 Nov 2005|05:45pm] |
BPAL swaps
bottles:
GC
Frumious Bandersnatch
Unreleased:
Zero (70% full, swap for bottle of Ice Queen or another rare on my wishlist)
decants:
Marshmallow Poof (Swap for a decant of Sugar Slathered Candy Apple)
Virgo
Leo
Taurus
Bitter Moon (x2)
Lotus Moon
Hellion (only for rares)
Death of Autumn
Mr Ibis
Crypt Queen (only for rares)
Monsterbait Underpants (only for rares)
Monsterbait: Bloody Mary
Monsterbait BiggerKritters
Victoria
Spider
Fairy Market
Punkie Night '06
Talvikuu
Pink Moon '07
Tamamo No Mae
Fire Pig
Australian Copperhead
Boomslang
imps
Wishlist:
LE:
EMPTY bottles of:
Skadi or Ice Queen
Bottles or decants of
Ice Queen*
Skadi*
Sugar Slathered Candied Apple*
Spiked Punch
La Befana
GC bottles:
Moon Rose
Maenad
Blood
Blood Lotus
Akuma
Blood Countess
Hells Belle
Yvaine*
Lady MacBeth
imps:
Kill-Devil
Poisoned Apple
Dana O Shee
Schrodinger's Cat
Dirty
Sea of Glass
Black Phoenix
Lady of Shalott
Whip
Imp
Gluttony
Love-Lies-Bleeding
Sundew
Voodoo Lily
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[30 Sep 2005|02:57pm] |
I feel like I neglect everyone and I don't do enough to show people how much I like them and appreciate them. Especially on TF and LJ.
I'm sorry. I don't want to name names because I don't want to make people feel left out.
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[23 Sep 2005|05:07pm] |
I can not believe I am saying this. but I absolutely love Britney Spears' new perfume.
please don't quote me. :/
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[22 Sep 2005|11:35pm] |
um. is there like some kind of behind-the-scenes *shh!!* kind of thing going on against me on TF?
I'm like expecting people in the sanctuary are talking about me or somthing. or maybe I'm just paranoid?
-Everyone else's PP posts are in the archives but mine, and I posted twice since december.
-My MP thread hasn't even gotten a sympathy post. I have bumped it fucking four times and there has been nothing. and I'm wondering if it is because of the stupid fucking lie going around with my last post about me being a thief.
there are so many people on TF I admire and want to get to know and be friends with so badly. but I don't know how to go about persuing it. I just hate feeling as though I am disliked for some reason.
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| first tatt |
[19 Sep 2005|05:46am] |
Celtic Tree of Life on the inside of my left wrist.
( Read more... )
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| well? go on... |
[01 Sep 2005|08:31pm] |
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| repost |
[15 Jul 2005|04:41am] |
Heat.
It's too early for this kind of night-heat, the sort that creeps in slowly like white steam from a winter pipe, or like lethal gas from the slots inside an execution gas chamber. Gently swirling 'round you like a lover's ghost, whispering in your tender ears and enveloping you in its heat like a warm electric blanket.
You've got your stereo on full blast and you don't know what to do with yourself, with this blatantly large span of time before you. You are lonely, but in a tired out way.
Loneliness starts out, in its early stages, like a ripe peach or plum. You almost relish in it, thrive in it, roll around in it like a little piggy. It is comforting, you can still dream, you may become more creative in this loneliness, for you have more time to be alone, more time to balk in the newfound world you have crafted of sad love songs and poetry and memories and reasons "why."
Then it starts to dry out, like this peach or plum, it gets sucked dry. Sometimes it literally feels like this, as though someone shoved a straw into you and sucked out your soul.
The old love songs and poetry and memories no longer supply your masochistic closet. You are blank. Like someone erased the chalkboard of your mind, or washed the grey clouded windows to your sucked-out soul.
It is hard to get up in the morning. You hear everyday people complain of this problem, but you know it is not nearly the same. They have lives, something, someone who makes them happy enough to want to look forward to, even while in the refreshing netherworld of sleep.
For you, there is nothing. And it scares you, angers you that this "nothing" is absolutely nothing.
All you desire to do is lie in bed, on the floor, somewhere, and think. All you want is to escape this nothing, so you sleep and you dream, only to wake again.
The only real way to describe this feeling, is to imagine you are slowly being baked by the sun in the Sahara desert. You are dying of thrist, of starvation. You are a prune, a peach, empty of any or all that is good anymore, like an old frail skeleton corpse of a person that used to be.
Sometimes someone is able to break through the surface of your endless abyss. It can seem rare that any such thing could happen, seeing as you have already long ago confirmed and supposedly proved your theory that you would always be alone.
Sometimes this person can be a romantic interest, sometimes just a good old platonic friend. This can't be just any old someone, or it would have happened eons ago.
They have to grab your attention, and this is usually hard to do first of all seeing as you are always wearing the clouded-over grey wrap around glasses.
There is always someone, if you just take off the glasses for just a nanosecond. There can be more than one. There can be many.
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[30 May 2005|12:21am] |
| You Were Actually Born Under: | ![]() | | You Should Have Been Born Under: | 
Your most comfortable inside your head - and often daydream the day away.
You have an artistic temperament that makes you seem creative to some, eccentric to others.
You avoid conflict at all costs, and you have a difficult time with relationships.
Attractive and with good manners, you tend to shine in social situations.
You are most compatible with a Pig or Rabbit. |
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[25 May 2005|04:49pm] |
I bought my first ever bikini today. Dont really know how to feel about it. heh. I needed a swimsuit and this one looked good on me so I got it.
but... a bikini?
be shocked. be amazed.
but no pictures yet. heh.
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[18 May 2005|02:55pm] |
Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results | Warmth | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Intellect | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Emotional Stability | ||||||||| | 22% | | Aggressiveness | ||||||||||||||| | 46% | | Liveliness | ||||||||||||||| | 50% | | Dutifulness | ||||||||||||||| | 42% | | Social Assertiveness | ||||||||||||||| | 50% | | Sensitivity | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| | 82% | | Paranoia | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Abstractness | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Introversion | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Anxiety | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| | 82% | | Openmindedness | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| | 86% | | Independence | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Perfectionism | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Tension | |||||||||||||||||| | 54% | | Take Cattell 16 Factor Test (similar to 16pf)personality tests by similarminds.com
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| compliment freebies |
[27 Apr 2005|06:44pm] |
stolen from kurt, sheoulwyvern. with, of course, a LOT of editing. ;)
Okay Cainejw came up with this compliment deal and part of the deal is that if you get a compliment from him you have to do a compliment thing in your journal. Kind of a pass it on thing. So here's the deal chuckleheads you put a comment in this post or entry as it is and I will reply with a compliment then you got to do the same thing in your journal. It's a good way to find out what your friends admire about you. What else.... ah limit one per customer if you try and get two compliments I'll delete the first compliment I gave you and just say you're a fskin moron, greedy, dirty devil bastard himself, complement whore and the whole world will know you're transgression. Or at least the people that read this journal. So step right up folks and get your free compliment while they are hot.
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[14 Apr 2005|12:32pm] |
If I ever become a serial killer, the theme will be promiscuous men who jack off to porn every chance they get and whistle at busty/assy girls, and think its 'ok' to round up girls like cattle to fuck several times a week.
Just thinking about it makes me want to fucking puke.
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[12 Apr 2005|02:06pm] |
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mood |
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 blah |
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music |
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bright eyes "No Lies, Just Love" |
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ehh. Just another day. Haven't gotten a call yet and ehh. whatever.
doing you know what way too much. running out of money/patience. But I'd rather be here than at home. I couldn't go back home.
Just got to stick it out for a little while more.
I found out I overdrew like 10 bucks from my checking account because I transferred 100, I checked it today and it was 69. stupid motherfucking overdraft fees. there goes 30 bucks of good money I could spend on food.
someone keep their fingers crossed for me.
Had to deal with Christine last night. She's a good friend but she's also like the bossy older sister you have to try to get along with.
She's really pissed that I'm smoking and doing other things I probably can't mention here. She talks to me like I'm fucking 13 and s=don't know what the hell I'm doing. I hate the way she is so condescending. So I don't tell her EVERYTHING, because I know she's just going to have something negative to say. The only time she wasn't like that was when I was dating alex because she was the one who set us up, and she still thinks we belong together, saying three times is the charm. It fucking pisses me off.
She has no idea what I went through with him and how much pain he caused me. And she distrusts anyone else I decide to be with, just because she doesn't know them.
She is so selfish like that, she wants things to go her way only, she wants to live in a world that only she is allowed to design.
I'm happy with who I'm with and I don't care what anyone has to say about it.
Well, I guess I'm going to have to deal with her a lot more since she's marrying my cousin pretty soon.
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xdarkbirdx's journal
